🏋🏾 The Ego Audit

Mar 10, 2026

As we get older we think we improve at at reading other people and ourselves.

We look for confidence or success as signals of character. But what if we are looking at a mask?

To actually see the truth in others and in ourselves, we have to look at what leaks out when the mask slips.

Psychology teaches us a tough lesson:

The things we notice in other people are usually reflections of ourselves.

If we judge it, we might be hiding it.

If we admire it, we might be afraid to show it.

If we want to lead better, we have to stop projecting our stuff onto everyone else.

We need to own it.

Take 10 minutes. Be honest.

If these answers don’t sting a little, we aren’t going deep enough.

The Annoyance: Who is the one person driving me crazy right now? What specific trait do I dislike in them? (This is our shadow. We are likely hiding this same trait in ourselves.)
The Hero: Who do I secretly look up to? (This is our potential. They have something like guts, calm, or creativity that we have too but we are scared to use it.)
The Snap: When was the last time I lost my cool or got defensive? (This shows where our ego is weak. What image are we trying to protect?)
The Truth: When someone gives me feedback, do I make excuses or do I listen?
The Price: How much energy am I wasting trying to look perfect? (Imagine if we used that energy to actually do the work to improve.)

The Bottom Line

We don’t need to be perfect. We just need to be aware.

When we own our “less desirable” parts, nobody can use them against us. We become harder to trigger and easier to trust and connect with.

Try this before your next big meeting. Reply and let me know which one hit home.